This month, of June, has been :|
So I was listening to Rainie Yang's song, Ai Mei, and idk why, but tears came from my eyes, I guess with everything happening around me, things that make me happy, & things that make me sad, everything, that song was the song i was just listening to the right moment to me hit hard.
This 1 person in my life, is a very important person in my life. She taught me, Was there, somewhere, 4rm little to now, and in the future she will be, Weishema? now, I feel like your drifting away from me? The words that we speak, its not the same, the feeling of the way you act around me, is not the same, it doesnt feel the same, I can accept change, but then what i cannot accept is you not replying to me, or is it a part of life?
Or are you thinking something, that I dont wish for you to think, and is pushing me, so i know? There are so many unanswered questions, but can i really just sit here, and feel sorry for myself?
NO, thats why I'm pushing myself, So I know, But I really want you to understand, right, I know it's not my parents fault that I have no sister, ha, I blame myself, cause I Can't be that special daughter you want :) Or at least it feels so. I love You Mom&Dad! every much, but I want you guys to know, that in a hmong girl's life, like all you elder's always say it, a girl only borrows her parents house to stay in, till she goes off and gets married, you guys may think that, but down my life, down my road, i will always have time for you guys, just that, I'm not gonna be here forever
My dear brothers, I know we fight, we argue, but thats just part of being siblings, I know you guys look after me, cause im your only sister, but please do remember all the things we gone through together, you can easily take a person for granted, but try not to, try doing things for yourself sometimes ahha :P
Watch out life, this is me expressing my thinking for you guys to hear, read it or not, its your choice to read, dont like it, not my fault, I'm tired, but yet, I'm moving forward, You may think of me whatever, but please dont judge me, till you have gotten to know me, I have not hate-en any1 that i know of, but once you say things i really really dont like, I have learn to react fast, and but at the same time, control my temper, regarding my volleyball team, ha, let them talk, let them talk till their heart desire, but those who are strong, stay strong, and learn to fight back the right back, I know we have very little team members, but I believe, but as i say it, even if the whole world is against me, i will find a way to stand up again, I fail/doubt myself a lot, but till I gain enough confidence, I will not stop pushing myself
IDK if u guys read this, but if u did, lets get ready for a match! I'm not gonna worry about those who doesnt want to practice and doesnt show up, I'm only gonna worry about those, who DOES give me an effort, and is NOT scared to speak up to me, when they think something can be changed
I cant work around everyone's schedule, i know your busy, but you can only do what you are allowed to, to !
AHHHH! I can scream my head off, my shoulder are stressed, but hello world, i'll met you soon!
I may feel like pple are drifting away 4rm me, but I'm Not giving up, w/o a fight!
Wu CHUN!! JIA YOU! i know maybe not everything is turning out how u want it to be, but please do remember your health okay!
Love HAO MEI!